“Forever Eyes Wide”

I started the essay that got me into college with the line I never thought I would say this, but voles changed my life. It’s true – learning about montane voles from Dr. Rosemary Smith in RMBL’s high school program set me on the course I’m on today. But it would be more accurate to say that RMBL changed my life. The animals, the plants, the mountains – but also the scientists, the course instructors, and the other students.  

There isa song lyric that always reminds me of RMBL: No we’re not wasting time, we’re forever eyes wide. It makes me think of when I was a third grader, catching sight of impossible granite pillars between clouds on a rainy day and stopping to stare, jaw dropped, eyes wide. My RMBL summer camp counselor stopped too, and told me, “That’s Gothic Mountain. Pretty amazing, huh?”  

Years after I learned to make bark rubbings of trees as a summer science camper, I added that song to a playlist of nature music and took RMBL’s high school course. At the time, I was frustrated with the hours I spent in classrooms where questions were treated like “wasting time,” and the anxiety disorder I have had most of my life was doing its best to swallow me whole – which made school a tad difficult. Then I spent an incredible two weeks learning science from passionate, kind people and getting the breath knocked out of me every time I looked around. I left knowing the rest of high school would be worth it to keep doing field biology – maybe even to come back to RMBL one day. 

After a year of college, I applied for the undergraduate program, and I think I stared at my computer screen in sheer joy for about five minutes when I found out I got in. I did not lose an ounce of that wonder all summer long. 

Even though days fly by, we’re forever eyes wide… 

After this summer, that song also makes me think of how I saw the mountain several times a day and felt just as awestruck as I did when I was nine. There’s a lot of uncertainty at this phase of my life – and frankly in the whole world right now. But I know I want to be as curious and passionate as all the people at RMBL who have helped me become who I am today – and if I can make it back to that enchanted valley to gasp at Gothic Mountain again, that would be wonderful too.  

(The song I quote here is called “Eyes Wide” by MAGIC GIANT.)

-Article written by RMBL alumni, Grace Shirley

Photo Credit: Grace Shirley – Grace was a participant in the RMBL undergraduate program this summer.